1. |
Animal BC's
02:08
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A an alligator bites a B bear and C a cow is cryin',
'Cause D a duck done doo-dooed all over her head.
E an elephant and his pal F frog are skippin' church on Sunday,
For a game of poker with G billy goat instead.
H a horse helps himself to a course of I fried iguanas.
A J jaguar doe-C-does with a K kangaroo.
L a lion is dippin' Skoal with a mangy M mouse,
And N a narwhal picks himself up a new pack of chew.
Well every Friday night after we get paid,
You know what we like to do.
Go out a-singin' them Animal BC's,
In a place where A is for animal and B is for beer,
And C is for cuttin' the rug.
An O octopus pisses off a P pig for pickin' on her piglets.
And Q a quail's diggin' taters with an R raccoon.
S a squirrel and his friend T turtle form a rockin' jug band,
With U an umbrella bird who plays the spoons.
Well, it's Friday, we've all been paid,
You know what we're gonna do,
Go a-singin' them Animal BC's,
In a place where A is for animal and B is for beer,
And C is for cuttin' the rug.
V a vulture and W walrus are sittin' on the front porch.
They take a big whiff and they say "Smell that honeysuckle!"
Z a zebra jumps over X fox and yakety Y yak,
'Cause he's so damned tired of always being last.
Well, Friday night, we've all been paid,
You know what we're a-doin',
We're singin' them Animal BC's,
In a place where A is for animal and B is for beer,
And C is for cuttin' the rug.
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2. |
Clark County Jail
02:37
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I stuck a dime in the phone and I dialed her number
Said, "Kimmy, what's happened to us?"
She said, "Sloan, you're an ass, a drunken maniac,
Got me a restrainin' order against you."
I grabbed my bottle of Jim Beam and I drained my last swallow,
And I slammed it down on the bar.
I hung up the phone, grabbed my aching knee bone,
And I limped my way out to my car.
I slammed into the dumpster of her apartment complex,
And I busted through her front window screen.
She was sitting with Duke around a candle light dinner,
Drinking Earnest and Julio Gallo.
Well, I picked up a chair and I went for Duke's head,
And he jumped up and he pushed me on the floor.
He tied me up with a rope, washed his hands off with soap,
And Kimmy said, "Man, I'm calling the cops."
I wiggled and squirmed and pulled my knife from my boot,
Cut the rope and I split through the door.
As I looked back at Kimmy, I slammed into a cruiser,
And the coppers slapped the handcuffs on me.
I'm a punk, I'm a drunk, I'm a-wasted again.
Bruised bloody and callin' for Earl.
So I'll spend another night in the Clark County Jail,
While Duke lays at home with my love.
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3. |
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I wanna be chained to the barge that's sailin' to my girl
Cincinnati is wearin' and tearin' down on me
I'll sleep chained to a pile of coal on the river
If it means I can see my Mindy in St. Louis
I'll quit my job at Proctor and Gamble
Buy a fourteen karat golden wedding ring
And ride that barge all the way to the port in Missouri
Where I will see my Mindy standin' and waving to me
I'll greet her covered head to toe with black soot from the coal barge
Give her a big dirty kiss on her pink clean cheek
And she'll soap me up and rinse me all down
And she will march me off to the Justice of the Peace
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4. |
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I love it when you look at me and motion,
To follow you on up the stairs.
And it only takes a minute or two,
To get us goin' on our way,
With a quickie in the afternoon.
I love those days when my morning has been dragging,
And I'm clear up to my neck in my work.
To look up, see you standin' at the door,
Sayin', "Hurry up, man, it's a quarter to four,
Time for a quickie in the afternoon."
I get so damn high, as though I can fly
From my bootstraps, clear up to the sky.
And there ain't nothing on this earth today,
That can take my blues away,
Like a quickie in the afternoon.
I love the fact that you are my woman,
This day, tomorrow and forever more.
And I love that neither rain nor shine,
You won't let a single day go by,
Without a quickie in the afternoon.
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5. |
Bejean
04:13
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Didn't I hear you sayin' you loved me?
Didn't I hear you sayin' you cared?
I'll be your little red rooster
You'll be my little red hen
Got somethin' for you honey
Been waitin' for you all my life
And now it's all right
But you sure put up a heluva fight
Yer my little Bejean
Gonna put you on the cover of my heart's magazine
Been a long time girl my love's been true
Been a long time girl been romancin' you
I'll be your big black stallion
You'll be my little white mare
Got somethin' for you honey
Been waitin' for you all my life
And now it's all right
But you sure put up a heluva fight
Yer my little Bejean
Gonna put you on the cover of my heart's magazine
And I'm fryin' like a fritter in a pan
Why don't you plug up your tub and take me by the hand now
When you gonna wake up to the scene, Bejean?
Bejean, Bejean
Short up and misty luvin' you long
Short up and misty in the mood of my favorite song
Be your big brown boar babe
You'll be my little brown sow
Got somethin' for you honey
Been waitin' for you all my life
And now it's all right
But you sure put up a heluva fight
Yer my little Bejean
Gonna put you on the cover of my heart's magazine
And I'm fryin' like a fritter in a pan
Why don't you plug up your tub and take me by the hand now
When you gonna wake up to the scene, Bejean?
Bejean, Bejean
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6. |
Rachel You Weasel
05:14
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Racheal, you weasel, you took my heart and broke it
and left me standing on my own
I thought you were something,
but you're really less than nothing
and I've got a broken heart on my hands
when I first met Racheal, sweet lovely lady
I opened my heart to her
this woman of charms fell into my arms
and made my life so complete
but all of my friends did not want to know her
they said, (Clayton)"we've seen her type before
(Judd) she'll be nice for a while,
but she's got other guys;
(both) she'll use you and dump you in the cold"
Racheal, you weasel, you took my heart and broke it
and left me standing on my own
I thought you were something,
but you're really less than nothing
and I've got a broken heart on my hands
that's not my Rachael; you don't understand her
I think she's the one for me
just 'cuz you got no woman that is not a reason
to talk like you do about mine
just take all your nonsence and leave me alone
I know who's truly on my side
and don't you come nosin' around here no more
I don't need no friends like you
Racheal, you weasel, you took my heart and broke it
and left me standing on my own
I thought you were something,
but you're really less than nothing
and I've got a broken heart on my hands
last Sunday morning while going down Main street
who did I happen to see?
but my lovely Rachael applying her charms
to that hairbrush salesman named Bill
and there ain't no whisky that's strong enough
to drink that weasel off my mind
and I ain't got nothing but my voice, this guitar
and that high lonesome sound
Racheal, you weasel, you took my heart and broke it
and left me standing on my own
I thought you were something,
but you're really less than nothing
and I've got a broken heart on my hands
come on back boys!
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7. |
The Lawnmower Song
03:38
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My lawnmower's made for mowin' big lawns.
It's a twelve horsepower tall grass mowin' machine.
When it's time for mowin', well, I start that sucker goin',
Throw the handle and them blades start a-whirlin'.
My lawnmower, I'm a-lookin' out for danger.
Don't wanna be cuttin' up my good garden hose.
There's a frisbee and a log, watch out you little dog,
My lawnmower is not meant for killin'.
I drive my lawnmower all around the edge line,
Under trees and around the fence as best as I can.
There's some tall grass I can't get to,
So you know what I'll have to do,
Get my weed wacker and I'll wack them suckers out later.
Now my lawnmower is not built for racin',
It's for crusin' around the lawn and gettin' tan.
My cute neighbor's in her pool, and I'm a-lookin' real cool,
With my T-shirt tied around my head just like a sweatband.
Now my lawnmower, it bags all the grass behind it.
I don't have to bust my ass with a garden rake.
I'll dump it out on the burn pile, and take a break for a little while,
Light myself a smoke and set that bitch on fire.
If you need some heavy duty mowin' just give me a holler.
I'll mow your whole damn lawn won't ask for a single dollar.
I have a kick-ass twelve horsepower, will travel!
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8. |
I Hurt You
03:28
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You know about those women,
Their names are all around town.
And you know how many times I said
I wouldn't go after them.
So, now you're cryin' in the night,
And I finally understand that
I've hurt you, I've hurt you, and you're down.
As you look at me with those eyes
like when we first met,
deep as the ocean with your love blue for me,
I feel I don't deserve someone as loving as you
Now that I've hurt you, I've hurt you and I'm sorry.
This is the first time love has stuck to me,
And my heart is beatin' scared.
I've messed it up so many times,
And I hate myself for that.
I wish I could just wipe it away,
And start once again with you.
When will I ever learn
Not to hurt you, not to hurt you, any more.
I see a change coming over you,
and you take me in your arms,
Forgiveness fills your eyes and runs down your cheeks.
I want to be the best that I can, and then a little more
To love you, to love you like you deserve
To love you, to love you like you deserve
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9. |
Duncan Ball
03:39
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Duncan Ball wore a yellow ski vest,
The kind with the sleeves that zipped off,
And a pair of faded boot-cut jeans.
A pair of faded boot-cut jeans.
Duncan Ball had a real wild style.
He had some wacky crew cut hair,
And a big old tear in his underwear.
A big old tear in his underwear.
Duncan Ball, he walked kind of funny,
In his ski vest and boot-cut jeans,
And an oversized Goody comb.
An oversized Goody comb in his back jeans pocket.
Duncan Ball was a school librarian.
One day I was cutting class,
Duncan Ball came around and busted my ass.
Duncan Ball, he busted my ass.
Duncan Ball got a job at the 76 gas station.
When I had to mow my grass,
I'd pull up to Duncan for a can of gas,
And Duncan Ball, he'd pump my gas.
And Duncan Ball was so polite;
Duncan Ball will go far in life.
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10. |
Anna Lee
04:34
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Won't you say hello to Miss Anna Lee for me.
Tell her I'd really like to meet her on Sunday.
With grease all in my hair,
I could meet her at the square,
In front of the fountain at 12:30.
And I would bring her a big bouquet of flowers.
And I would drive us around in my pick-up.
There ain't no man around gonna have a day like me,
When I'm together with Miss Anna Lee.
Miss Anna Lee can't meet you on Sunday.
There's a man come to see her from the city.
They say he's young and lean,
And his eyes have got a gleam,
That caught the fancy of Miss Anna.
Well, there ain't no one who can love her as much as I do.
And I'll prove it to you all in a showdown.
Won't you all gather 'round, when I take this stranger down,
In front of the eyes of Miss Anna.
Now, the city boy had a nice suit on,
And he drove Miss Anna Lee in a big car.
He puffed his chest up huge,
Thinking "What do I got to lose,
Against a scrawny, little country boy like this?"
But the country boy's heart was the truer.
And he tossed that city boy into the sewer.
He got down on his knees, in front of Miss Anna Lee, and said,
"Won't you meet me on Sunday?
Won't you, please, Miss Anna Lee?"
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11. |
Bai Bai Baby
03:51
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In the middle of a cornfield just outside of Dali
She had second sight, man the light was bright
Been too damn long since the seeds of her heart hit the mountain wind
Them buds are pretty grand in a faraway land
With a hoe in her hand she said "Pa let me go down to Shanghai"
You're much too young you're only 21 Bai baby
You'll get wings for flight when the time is right
Her high school bubby took a job in a brand new shopping mall
She got another letter like a fallin' down feather
Said the city is better, Bai baby when you comin' to Shanghai?
Bai baby, Bai baby, Bai baby, Bai Bai baby
Bai Bai baby on an all-night bus to Kunming
Where she'll see the sights, catch a train at night
She's goin' to a faraway land on the eastern cost line
Train pounds along like a disco song
Where she'll dance all night long with her bubby in the bright lights of Shanghai
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12. |
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Saturday night, five o'clock
The working week is just about shot
Time to head down to the Round-Up
Grab my hat, and grab my boots
Tell that woman I'm on the loose
As I four-wheel my way across the big town
To high-step my way across the dance floor
Down at the Round-Up Saloon
I'm just an average workin' guy
I sure don't like to give new things a try
And I didn't think I would take to line dancing
But I got really drunk, so I gave it a whirl
And soon I'm together with a beautiful girl
And I've been back every weekend since then
To high-step my way across the dance floor
Down at the Round-Up Saloon
My arms and legs are moving to the rhythm of the music
I clap, stomp, and turn with everyone else
I feel like I'm floating a foot above the dance floor
This clumsy boy has become a dancin' fool
A dancin fool!
I'm just an average workin' guy
I sure don't like to give new things a try
And I didn't think I would take to line dancing
But I got really drunk, so I gave it a whirl
And soon I'm together with a beautiful girl
And I've been back every weekend since then
To high-step my way across the dance floor
Down at the Round-Up Saloon
Saturday night, five o'clock
The working week is just about shot
Time to head down to the Round-Up
To high-step my way across the dance floor
Down at the Round-Up Saloon
To high-step my way across the dance floor
Down at the Round-Up Saloon
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13. |
Sensitive Feelings
04:20
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Lyin' in my bed I'm a lookin' up at the ceiling
Bed bugs a crawlin' and the paint on the wall is peeling
The way that you play the game they say is quite revealing
Gotta show that woman all about my sensitive feelings
Feelings for the girl I adore
Got me cryin' now for evermore
I'm a guest at the table of a game which she is dealing
Somethin' in that lover boy's hands which he's concealing
Bad luck of the draw once again has sent me reeling
My poker face can't hide none of my sensitive feelings
Feelings for the girl I adore
Got me cryin' now for evermore
Singin' my love songs to her in her garden I'm kneeling
Woman hear my song and start my broken heart healing
After all these years her love for me is congealing
I can finally share with her all of my sensitive feelings
Feelings for the girl I adore
Got me singin' her praises for evermore
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14. |
Eagle Rock
04:28
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It's been over 2 years since I've come to Eagle Rock
Haven't had the gumption to come here very much
Got a flask of courage while I tell my lonesome tale
As the sun goes down on Eagle Rock
I used to come here all the time with Samantha on my arm
Her hair was red like fire, and her skin, oh so fair
She kissed me so tenderly, the howling wind would stop
As the sun went down on Eagle Rock
I had so many women, but none could compare to her
The Good Lord told me to offer her my ring
Tears of joy filled her eyes, as I took her in my arms
As the sun went down on Eagle Rock
Just 2 days after that, my old flame came to town
She was waiting in the shower to go another round
As I was telling her to go, Samantha came to call
As the sun went down on Eagle Rock
A redhead's heart is like a brushfire, torn up in the wind
Engine roared, tires screamed as she went on up the road
I followed her with my aching heart I had to set the record straight
As the sun went down on Eagle Rock
When I came around the hairpin turn, that's when I found her wreck
There was no doc, nor miracle, that could bring her back
This woman's love had come and gone so quickly from my life
Like the sun goes down on Eagle Rock
It's been over 5 years, and when I have the mind
I come here to Eagle Rock to spend a little time
I hear her voice, smell perfume, and feel she's close to me
As the sun goes down on Eagle Rock
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15. |
Magic Circle
03:31
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Magic Circle, endless love
Trip to Phoenix for a promenade shove
A bucket of buckshot and a crochet dove
A level, a hammer, and a pair of suede gloves
Four on the floor and a map light above me
Magic Circle plows lines long
Fills my head with a lamb light song
Seven gallons in a big brass gong
If my love comes along then I'll belong here
And if my love doesn't last then I'll be home again
Magic Circle spilled my grain
Breaking down for a timely rain
Eleven jackals I could not tame
Eleven tries turned out the same
Pulled myself from La Brea with a pulley and chain again
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The Grogan Brothers Kyoto, Japan
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